Meseci i distance
Trebaju mi prekretnice u zivotu,kako male tako i one vece i bitnije. I sinoc sam shvatila to dok sam u polu snu razgovarala sa osobom sa kojom definitivno nisam trebala. Sada,nakon dve godine gluposti i sranja u mom zivotu koje je ON izazvao,nekako drugacije gledam na te iznenadne pozive,prilazim njihovom razmatranju sa blage distance ,distance kakva je recimo izmedju Beograda i Pariza,dakle od 600km,oprilike,tacno ga nisam videla 6 meseci sto znaci jedan mesec nevidjanja 100 km distance. I on je u meni napravio tih 600 km distance ,a da toga verujem nije ni svestan. Za razliku od svih proslih najava nasih propalih pocetaka,ovoga puta bila sam spremna na klasicno stanje u mojoj glavi srcu. Bila sam spremna na napade panike i neki sizofreni glas koji ce mi dovikivati na svakih deset minuta.. Ovoga puta ce sve biti drugacije. Niti smatram da je ovo pocetak bilo cega,niti smatram da se osoba poput njega moze promeniti. Stvar je u tome sto sam se ja promenila,na bolje nadam se :D Pa zato sada mogu da dopustim i svom razumu da nesto odluci u celoj ovoj situaciji. Nisam osoba koja veruje u sudbinu i cudan splet okolnosti,ali sam ovako nesto predosetila. Intuicija ,sta li je. Znala sam da se nesto sprema,jer jos od petka imam tu neobjasnjivu mesavinu ludila i proleca i neke kao opijenosti,sa malo panike u sebi. kAO STo sam na pocetku rekla,trebaju mi prekretnice u zivotu. Dosadilo mi je da stalno cekam isto,a to nikad ne dobijam. Nisam vise klinka koja ce trcati cim joj zazvoni telefon u pola noci samo da bi se videla sa njim. Ta klinka je ostala u kuci zaborava ,negde daleko,u svom vecnom snu,prepustila je mesto malo drugacijoj devojcici da gradi novi put u ovoj surovoj,blago receno krvavoj bajci :D
16 Komentari |
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aooo sad ga i ti pretera...mislimmm... krvava bajka :))
sad se Desanka Maksimović prevrće u grobu :D
Autor beliocnjakx — 07 Mar 2013, 20:07
beliocnjak hehe dobro svako ima pravo na svoje misljenje :D Nisam mislila na krvavu bajku Desanke M,niti da je uvredim na bilo koji nacin time sto sam upotrebila ovo na kraju,mislila sam u smislu svoje price koju sam pre dve godine zamisljlala i zapravo videla kao bajku sa savrsenim krajem ,ali sada znam zasto je krvava bajka. :D
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